I've not posted for a while, but that doesn't mean that my pile of Shrigley crap has been getting any smaller. Oh no!  I've been adding some choice nuggets, including this helpful enamel sign that I got all the way from the USA, from Paul & Wendy. It's one of a limited run of 100, and a snip at $250!

Not sure whether I should actually put it up outside my house to deter Animal Liberation/ISIS/Real IRA sympathisers, or stick it in a drawer with all my other stuff never to be seen again.

It seems a bit expensive to put outside in the grotty weather, but then, whats the point of it all if I don't actually use this stuff?  What is art actually for anyway?

My god, I've found myself questioning my entire existence with this existential philosophical discourse. Best put Homes Under The Hammer back on and have a cup of tea.

Shrigley playing cards

What a result! I thought I'd lost these - I'd almost given up all hope of ever seeing them again and then they turn up (a little scuffed) at the bottom of a box.

A pack came up for sale on eBay about a year ago but I couldn't bring myself to part with the cash knowing I had a pack somewhere. 

Very happy indeed. I shall now place them in a drawer and not look at them for another 3 years. 

'Don't Say The Word Shit' box of 110 Matches

A triangular box of 110 matches, produced for American hipster website and emporium of sweary/cute shite, Blue Q. 

This is the only object I've ever bought from Blue Q. It cost me $5 plus about $35 postage to the UK.

Blue Q are mostly notable for adding me to their emailing list and sending me shitloads of impenetrable marketing emails full of pointless products - with astonishing regularity.

If I ever want a fridge magnet with an 'ironic' picture of a Japanese girl's arsecheeks on it, or some hand sanitiser snappily titled 'Maybe you touched your genitals' I know exactly where to go. 

Bank card holder for Orange

A very topical Shrigley artefact, what with all that Brazilian writhing and swooning in the penalty box. 

This funny little bit of plastic was produced as a promotional bank card holder for mobile phone company Orange in 2004. I have no idea what it's relevance to a mobile phone contract might be, but it's very useful for administering admonishments whilst demonstrating a cursory knowledge of the rules of football.

I own one of these that is in perfectly pristine condition, and a second that has been exposed to sunlight and some sort of chemical, and then scrunched up in a drawer. I like them both.